Friendship After the Nest Empties

If you are preparing for the empty nest or in the empty nest, then you will want to know Charlotte Guest. We just had her on my podcast and she was GREAT. She is a wonderful person with terrific ideas for people in the empty nest. This blog on developing friendships after the nest empties was very helpful. If you want to find more resources and listen to her blog, Empty Nest Guests, you can find her here.

Friendship After the Nest Empties

As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend. – Proverbs 27:17

After my nest was empty, I had time to give attention to the friendships I’d cultivated to this point in my life. I realized that some relationships that once sharpened me were a part of my life for a season – but the season had passed, and the relationships changed in intensity. Other relationships that revolved around children’s activities have faded like old photographs.

Those changes needed a bit of attention. I learned valuable lessons from those past relationships that are helping me be a better friend in this new season of life. Changes and endings can carry grief, but they also hold an invitation to growth.

Prayerfully reflecting on the reasons for those changes is a wise place to begin. Some changes in friendships are simply geography. Many people relocate at midlife or as they move toward retirement. Health problems or the loss of a spouse or child will shift some friendships into a different zone, as do caregiving responsibilities for family members.

Not spending time together can change the dynamics of a once-steady relationship. This new time in my life has revealed that some of my friendships have been based on shared history and not on ongoing purpose.

I want to be open to God’s sharpening purposes in my relationships. I pray each day, “Lord, show my Your way. Lead me to those you want me to be with.”

This prayer has helped me move forward and has created opportunities to develop some meaningful new relationships. Because of them, I’ve tried a new hobby and visited spaces and places I might not have otherwise. I am learning in this empty nest time to listen to the Lord’s leading, to open my heart, and to be intentional in nurturing friendships.

I am also recognizing in this season of change that there is temptation to isolate myself and turn my focus inward in unhealthy ways. To combat that, I am also learning to lean into my relationship with my dearest friend, Jesus. He meets me there, and inevitably spurs me to move outward toward others. A coal separated from fire loses its heat. To keep the fire and energy of my walk with God, I need to continue to pursue meaningful friendships, with old friends and new. Friendship hones my soul, and I pray I am doing the same in all the best ways in this season of my life.

Lord, thank you for the friends that have once been a part of my life but have gone on to new seasons. Thank you for those who are currently part of my life, and for those friends you have waiting for me just ahead. Please use all of these relationships to sharpen me so I can be a blessing to others. And above all, that you for Your friendship, Lord.