Sex, Drugs, and Media part 1

This is a seven-part series on the important issues of talking with our kids about sex, drugs and media. All research tells us the more positive value centered education on these subjects from home, the better kids do. Enjoy, and yet be challenged to take a very active lead in the battle for your children’s souls on these subjects.

Kids and Decision Making

Kids are receiving mixed messages when it comes to morals and values. Let’s take sexuality, for example. From home they hear, “Don’t do it” but not much more about the subject. From church (although it is hopefully changing for the better), they often hear either silence or “Don’t do it because it’s dirty, rotten and ugly.” From the secular media they often hear, “Do it.” The secular media is thrilled to sing, write and make movies about sexual promiscuity. When it comes to issues like drugs, sex and rock ’n’ roll, kids today are much more influenced by the secular media than by their parents.

At least three factors are involved in the decisions that kids are making about sex, drugs and music. We will look at two of the factors in this blog, and one next week.

They are important for parents to be aware of and to be prepared to respond to in a proactive manner.

Peer pressure.

Peer pressure is one of the most powerful forces affecting kids of all ages. If your children’s friends experiment with marijuana or pornography, then the odds are high that your children will, too. The first time I took a sip of alcohol, I was 13. I was at a party where there was alcohol, and though I had already decided I wouldn’t drink, my desire to be accepted by my friends was much greater than my desire not to drink.

Emotional involvement that exceeds their maturity level.

Kids are making decisions based on emotional involvement that exceeds their maturity level. For example, a 14-year-old girl with a poor self-image who is in love with a sexually promiscuous older guy is very easy to seduce. Her emotional involvement and desire to be liked by the guy are far stronger than the morals she may have learned from home, church or school. She gives in to temptation, not because she’s a bad kid, but simply because no one ever helped her learn how to say no. If you have a late bloomer in your home, then get down on your knees and thank God. The decisions kids are making about morals and values today can and do affect them for life.

Just in case you think that dating at an early age is okay, look at these facts:

Age of Dating                      Percent Who Have Sex Before Graduation
12 Years                                    91 percent
13 Years                                    56 percent
14 Years                                    53 percent
15 Years                                    40 percent
16 Years                                    20 percent3

3Jeannie Echenique, “Early Dating May Lead to Early Sex,” USA Today, November 12, 1986, p. D1.

Help us reach the next generation of families

Back to Top
Avatar photo

Jim Burns

Jim Burns is the president of HomeWord. He speaks to thousands of people around the world each year. He has close to 2 million resources in print in 20 languages. He primarily writes and speaks on the values of HomeWord, which are: Strong Marriages, Confident Parents, Empowered Kids, and Healthy Leaders. Some of his most popular books are: Confident Parenting, The Purity Code, Creating an Intimate Marriage, Closer, and Doing Life with Your Adult Children. Jim and his wife, Cathy, live in Southern California and have three grown daughters, Christy, Rebecca, and Heidi; three sons-in-law, Steve and Matt, and Andy; and three grandchildren, James, Charlotte and Huxley.

  • About HomeWord

    HomeWord helps families succeed by creating Biblical resources that build strong marriages, confident parents, empowered kids and healthy leaders. Founded by Jim Burns, HomeWord seeks to advance the work of God in the world by educating, equipping, and encouraging parents and churches. Learn More »

  • Support Our Mission

    HomeWord is non-profit, donor supported ministry. If you would like to partner with HomeWord in our effort to help more parents and families you can make a donation. Your investment will allow us to expand this ministry by offering more resources to families and churches in need.

  • Contact Information

    • HomeWord
      PO Box 1600
      San Juan Capistrano, CA

    • Send us an email

    • 800-397-9725
      (M-F: 8:30am-5pm PST)